Satjiko Nichjolson
Was there a drastic change within the first few years of being the first lady of One Way Family Worship Center?
Yes, I would say so, because I had to readjust my schedule and my priorities for attendance and availability to ministry. Having to balance such a huge endeavor, along with my family, required Godly insight, direction and wisdom. There were so many tasks and goals that I was a part of with my husband, and again the balance of being a wife and a help-meet to ministry was a huge challenge of new ground. So I would say a few of the biggest changes were accepting new responsibilities towards others and myself, being able to juggle them successfully, and learning more of how to seek God and prioritize his goals and direction for his assignment in my life.
The title “First Lady” is used so highly in the church. Have you ever felt intimidated due to the duties of a First Lady?
No, I am a firm believer that in any area, the title does not make you but you make the title. I did not just get thrown into being a “First Lady.” What I mean by that is, it did not take me by surprise. I had been married for 15 years and I was well aware that my husband would be a pastor one day. So I utilized the first 15 years of marriage by seeking knowledge and guidance from other seasoned mentors to help prepare me with a solid foundation. They spoke into my life while I tried to work on accepting the call and allowing God to mold me into what he desired me to be as far as my character was concerned. Each woman has her own touch and I desire that the duties of the “First Lady” be those that God has equipped me for and that he has given me the grace and blessings to operate in. So to me the title of “First Lady” is unique to character and not definitive of her duties alone. Several duties come with the territory, but I feel that your significance in ministry is what really makes you the “First Lady.”
From a woman’s perspective, explain the difference between young women’s behavior now compared to when you were younger?
Wow, that is such a broad question because we have behavior in so many areas of life. But I would say that Young ladies today are a lot more daring and assertive. We were more reserved and gentle. Young ladies now are more demanding and even more vocal. We were aggressive in our day but I would say more with an attitude of paving the way than taking the mountain and getting to the top. Ladies now have a greater vision for accomplishment and I would say that is from the foundation that my generation has laid and began to execute. I also feel that in relationships the young ladies of today are much more aggressive and open at a much younger age. Sexuality, emotional development, as well as self-image all start now at a very young age. The behavior of the young ladies today seems to exemplify that relationship is a priority and an identity marker. In my day our goals and achievements were priority and relationship might happen during that process. It doesn’t seem like the Tom Boy stages are really there anymore, just the dainty, fashionable, feminine side. But personally I would like to see that stage come back because you have a lifetime to be a lady and it’s good to be a real child with real childhood experiences and save the older stages for when you really have graduated to being older.
Being the positive role model that you are, have you ever felt partially responsible for a young lady’s downfall in the church? Why or why not?
No, I haven’t felt responsible because I try my best daily to make a conscious effort to emanate a sound role model and speak words of wisdom and life into those that I come in contact with. I believe that your life is the greatest witness that you can have. It is my desire to be significant in the lives of individuals and in order to do that I must try daily to represent a Godly woman’s character. To say that it is impossible for me to not be partially responsible for a downfall, would be to say I am perfect. But there could unknowingly be a time where a young lady’s need may not be found in me or my character. She may have come from or been in a situation that my life could not touch, so therefore I may have unknowingly been unable to download or be the person that she may have needed due to a lack of sufficient culture or experience. So the possibility is definitely there from that standpoint. It would pretty much be that I was totally unaware of my negative influence if it were to happen, because I would say that I am committed to doing my best at consciously not being the cause in any way of any type of downfall, deliberate or not! However we all know that nobody is perfect!
Outside of church duties, what are some hobbies or other interests you participate in?
I love being a mother, and a wife and enjoying quality time with my family. I enjoy horses and horseback riding! I have fun bowling and I have been entertaining the thought of getting on a bowling league.
As a child, what were your dreams or goals? Also what are your goals ten years from now.
As a child I wanted to be a nurse, then a bilingual court stenographer, then an educator. I feel now being in ministry, I am educating 24/7. I wanted to travel as a child and go to lots of beautiful islands when I became an adult. Ten years from now I would say to be debt free, retirement goals on schedule, that I will have learned new hobbies and gotten very good at them! That I would be a better wife, mother, sister, aunt, first lady, woman and the list goes on. To continue to broaden my education. For my health to be completely what I would desire it to be. That my personal ministry will have taken root and begin to help the body of Christ and the Worship center to a much greater degree. To enjoy life to the fullest and experience some of the dreams that have not come to pass from my adulthood as of yet.
Did you grow up in a single or two parent home, and how did that affect the way you were raised?
I grew up in both! The first 10 years of my life I was in a single parent home, from then until I married at the age of 21, I was in a two parent home being raised by my grandparents. I think it gave me a perspective of great balance. My mom instilled in me modern day principles of life, foundation and how to achieve. She gave me the traits to be a woman of achievement in life. My grandparents were just the opposite. They instilled in me the home values and the character of being kind and loving towards people. They showed me the calm side of life and how to value the simple things and I would say with being raised by them I was able to get the qualities to interact with people from all walks of life, from corporate to just the person in your neighborhood store. I am grateful to God for both sides because I feel it was great balance and insight of two different mindsets and walks of life.
What are your views on girls with low self-esteem? Where do you think it stems from?
It’s very unfortunate! God made us special and to be cherished! We are wonderful creatures! During the time of creation, God decided to make us when he was done with everything else, because he said it would not be good for Adam to be alone. So God’s creation to him was not final until he brought the women into the equation! The Bible says, that we are fearfully and wonderfully made! It also says that we are the apple of Gods eye! So special that God gave his life for us, and because of that alone we should not ever feel negative about ourselves! Girls with low self-esteem need to be educated. But to have low self-esteem is usually not the girls fault, but it is a reaction to her environment. I don’t believe we are born with low self-esteem, but we develop personality during the early stages of our lives and in those stages we are extremely vulnerable and subject to influence and molding. If we are not given love and self-respect from our immediate parents or our family, not shown how to value ourselves and made to feel valued, then we will not have self-value. It must be brought to our attention that we are valuable! It is not that we are born without it, we just have to be made aware of its existence and that is the responsibility of our families. If someone doesn’t take on the responsibility to build us, then we suffer greatly as children and in this case, young girls will grow up to become women with low self-esteem, if they do not begin to take positive action and attach themselves to women of great caliber and strength so they will become lifted into positivity. Any person that is in relationship with a young girl can speak positive into her life, male or female. The fault can also be placed on the ignorance of the misuse of words when speaking to or when reprimanding. As parents and adults, our words have great ability to nurture or to cripple our children. We must take responsibility to consistently speak positive and utilize constructive criticism.
How do you define a virtuous woman?
I embrace my definition of a virtuous woman from the scriptures. She is a woman who has God and his Word preeminent in her life. Who forsakes her own will to do the will that his Word commands when it is comfortable or not so comfortable, because she is led by the spirit and not by the flesh, or what is socially acceptable. She is a woman who seeks God and his wisdom continually with her heart, mind and soul as she allows the fruits of her seeking to manifest and spill over into every aspect of her life. She is a well-mannered and considerate woman with high standards of proper behavior. She is a significant, unique and priceless woman who is committed to her mate, children and the kingdom of God. She can be put under a microscope and her character will speak well of her, because she has been shaped in the dark and from that she’s developed and birthed, rare qualities within. She does not allow her character to be influenced nor altered by her circumstances or environment. A virtuous woman is a woman who is consistent in her virtue, who is one of a kind and she cannot be duplicated. That’s why the Bible says in Proverbs that she is praise worthy, cause she’s all that!!!!
What is your advice to encourage young girls on their future goals?
My advice to encourage young girls on their future goals would be: to do as the scripture says and to put God first in all of your goals! Allow your faith in Him and your relationship to grow to great dimensions, because those two components are essential in regards to goals. Scripture says “in all your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths.” What better way to excel in your goals than to allow an all-knowing God to direct your path! You must always encourage yourself with the Word and confess it verbally as you strive, knowing that you can do all things through Christ as he strengthens you. You must realize concerning your goals that you will not always reach them in your timeframe, but allow God to do things on his timing if need be and trust that it’s going to work out for your benefit. Lastly to never stop asking, seeking and knocking for the answers and vision of your goals. God will not turn you away, and if he has given you vision which is simply a goal, then know that he will certainly give you provision, which is the tools to reach the goal. I say to dream big, and know that the sky are not the limit!
Be confident and refuse to give up! Confidence is a huge key to success! Know that challenges will always come in one form or another because that sometimes is a part of accomplishing the goal. Most things of great value do not come easy, but Christ is able to help you with your biggest obstacles and your smallest insecurities. Know that He loves you and He will always be there for you!
Bio
Satjiko Nicholson came to know the Lord Jesus as her personal savior at the age of 14. She accepted her call to the ministry in 1999 and ministers the Word of God with a practical but powerful approach. She presides over the Family Worship Center’s Women of Worship and is the founder and teacher of “The Preacher’s Wife” enrichment course, designed to expose the enemy and equip the minister’s wife to handle the complex issues they and their families face.
- Jewel Harris (2010 GirlSpeak editor)
